This just in from Human Rights Watch: U.S. Aligned With Iran in Anti-Gay UN Vote (via the King of Zembla).
[Excerpt]: In a reversal of policy, the United States on Monday backed an Iranian initiative to deny United Nations consultative status to organizations working to protect the rights of lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) people…."This vote is an aggressive assault by the U.S. government on the right of sexual minorities to be heard," said Scott Long, director of the LGBT rights program at Human Rights Watch. "It is astonishing that the Bush administration would align itself with Sudan, China, Iran and Zimbabwe in a coalition of the homophobic." [End excerpt]
Oddly enough, Empire Burlesque has just obtained a copy of a secret video showing some of the background negotations that led to this surprising development in international relations. The video has been authenticated by CIA experts as "every bit as real as the last bin Laden tape." However, CIA analysts said they could not account for the strange background music that accompanies the negotiations -- a droning, off-key saxophone riff that "sounds like something from a cheap porn movie," one agent said.
Below is a brief excerpt from a transcript of the film, depicting a key moment in the protracted session when the deal was actually consummated: the "money shot," as it is known in diplomatic parlance.
GEORGE: Your beard, Mahmoud, so rough, so manly…I can't believe I'm here with you like this, so close….so very close.
MAHMOUD: Ah, George, we have many things in common, so many things to share…. Our piety, our ideological extremity, our infallibility, our anatomy. Please, please put on the flight suit again. It…stirs me so.
GEORGE: Just for you, Mahmoud…Help me with this zipper. Did you like that gift I sent you?
MAHMOUD: You mean Iraq? Oh George, what can I say? Such magnificent generosity! Thank you so much for putting my friends in power….But this zipper…my hand is trembling…oh say it, George, say those words I long to hear. Those three little words that thrill my soul!
GEORGE (smirking lasciviously): Bring it on…