Another day, another mass slaughter of civilians in Afghanistan. This time the cull of "collateral damage" came not from the world-historical agon at Marja, where Anglo-American sahibs are leading a contingent of colonial troops in a heavily hyped, made-for-media operation that blew a household of civilians, including five children, to smithereens in its opening salvos.

No, the new bloodbath occurred many miles away, in Kandahar, after a NATO patrol evidently saw some Afghan civilians going about their own business in their own country. Naturally, this shocking state of affairs was thought to pose a dire threat to the uninvited invaders who have been rampaging around the country for more than eight years -- so, naturally, an airstrike was called in. Five human beings going about their own business in their own country were then blown to bits, and two more were wounded.

The double whammy of bad PR following these unrelated rub-outs has prompted some of the leading lions of Great Britain's armed forces -- worthy heirs to their world-spanning forbears, upon whose military glories the sun, it was said, never set -- to offer some words of wisdom to those to whom they have now passed the White Man's oh-so-heavy, oh-so-unwanted burden of global domination.

No less a personage than Her Majesty's Air Chief Marshall Jock Stirrup -- who also serves as Her Majesty's Chief of Her Majesty's Defence Staff -- stepped forward to offer the young American pups a pearl drawn from Britain's voluminous treasury of imperial experience. And what was that pearl? Why, here it is, from the Guardian:

"This operation … is not about battling the Taliban, it is about protecting the local population, and you don't protect them when you kill them."

By gad, sir, you've hit the nail on the head there, and no mistake. Killing people is indeed a rather ineffective way of protecting them. What piercing insight! What clarity of vision! "You don't protect people when you kill them." Is it any wonder that Britannia ruled the waves for so long?

Ah yes, but what can one do? The lesser breeds must be policed, after all. Nations must be invaded and occupied for years on end -- even centuries, as the Brits can tell you! -- and so one is bound to have these little bits of unpleasantness crop up from time to time in one's colonial bailiwick. Best take it with a stiff upper lip -- oh, and be sure to blame the recalcitrant tribes for their damnable refusal to accept the altruistic benefits poured out upon their captive land by one's humanitarian war machine. Right, Jock?

"Of course in any conflict situation accidents happen and we must remember that most of the civilian casualties are not caused by ISAF [the international security assistance force] – they are caused by the Taliban."

So that's all right then. If the native insurgents would just stop using violence to advance their agenda the way we use violence to advance our agenda, why then, we would stop using violence to advance our agenda. It's as simple as that. It's their own damn fault. After all, it is a well-known fact of history -- not to mention international law -- that foreign invaders are not responsible in any way for any violence that occurs in the course of their invasion and occupation of other lands by force. Or as Punch might say to Judy: "If you'll just lie down, I'll stop hitting you."

Then again, the Right Honourable Air Marshall, his American partners -- and indeed, their many media embeds -- might do well to ponder the Joseph Conrad quote with which Sukhdev Sandhu concluded his review of Mike Davis' classic 2001 work, Late Victorian Holocausts:

As Conrad's Marlow said in Heart of Darkness: "The conquest of the earth, which means the taking away from those who have a different complexion and slightly flatter noses than ourselves, is not a pretty thing when you look at it too much."

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Grandma Jefferson said:

Red Horse..... In a statement which must go down in history as one of the blackest of unconsciously black-comedic bloviations ever, another tame military whores gave vent to the following profound insight, with a perfectly straight face: "What's important about this operation is that it is the first major operation in which we will demonstrate, I think successfully, that the new elements of the strategy -- which combine not only security operations but economic reform and good governance at the local and regional level with a much more visible presence of Afghan forces -- will take place," Obama's national security adviser, retired Marine Gen. James L. Jones, said on "Fox News Sunday." http://crooksandliars.com/susie-madrak/afghanistan-offensive-marja-test-obam Yes, we'll blasting them to smithereens so we can give these benighted natives good governance and economic reform, after those necessary "security operations, of course. I suppose that to mean expanding the opium trade beyond what the CIA can conveniently vend, and handing over whatever other natural resources they have to the corporate overlords for liquidation, pickings getting slim here. These monsters of depravity discuss genocide and crimes against humanity as if they were talking about shredding paper. And I hear few voices of sanity in this Abomi-Nation raised in protest. Thank you as always Chris, one of the great things about the world is that you're on it. Never stop.

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February 16, 2010
Votes: +12

Phylter said:

	... In the FINEST british accent... "Damned bloody ungrateful fuzzy-wuzzies!" I'm a British citizen and have been ashamed of my country of birth since I could read. I turn 53 next month...
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February 16, 2010
Votes: +8

Debbie(aussie) said:

	... Wonderful snarkfest Mr Floyd. The whole thing in my mind read in the upper crust english accent, brought a little giggle. Then my bp rose in pure frustration and anger, yet again. Bloody Bastards.
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February 16, 2010
Votes: +5

Art James, bebop-o, GoodCelery! said:

a few poems, by *Wendell Berry.* etc., *THE ONGOING HOLY WAR AGAINST EVIL Stop the killing, or I'll kill you, you God-damned murderer! -- I'm sad-glad, Red Horse used the words` " black comedic." Sorta, Thanks? I think? When I read Chris's question` "Right, Jock?" That when I chuckled aloud. sad. It's so pathetic. ___ ` My thoughts went back to Hollywood's lousy flicks. It was the early seventies when I was max-PTSD. That's a DSM IV? Who would not be? Who denies? General are sociopathic psycho maniacal murderous. Of course, grunt ground-pounders get ground view? Note:` Rear LIFERS sip whiskey in rear hooch. There is no Marcus Aurelius today. Who walks with with ground forces? The invited Press only do photo Op. PTSD It's a normal reaction. I was indiscreet. Naive, and had no real idea how odious. Tallk to the creepy brass, They are dead. The WALKING DEAD. I was Nam drafted. I should go conk. There is no language. Devil has them. ` `Nam. Viet`Nam. Vietnam `Nam War. Experience abnormal war barbarism? If not drafted? Enlist if Ya pro-killing. It was the film of a rural`Deer Hunter' I recall a arrow pierced a hicks neck. A woman chuckled a hideous scream. She was somewhere in the back row. The theatre was erie. I left the film. A high school assembly gathered. A weak anti-war 'vet' actor spoke. His voice was fluffy `anti-war fluff. The actor was mumbo jumbo, sorta effete. It was unconvincing. War's horrible. Weep. Politics voice reminds me of coward effete. These"leaders" are undeveloped real twits. ` --- *THE LEADER Head like a big watermelon, frequently thumped and still not ripe. -- *A PASSING THOUGHT I think therefore I think I am. -- *ELDER Berry at 70. Well, anyhow, I am not going to die young. ` Goodnight. post or not? ( I don't know why I speak?) (It's getting ill and wearisome.) `

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February 16, 2010
Votes: +2

Bill Jones said:

	Phylter I'm a year older than you, and I agree.
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February 16, 2010
Votes: +2

john kelley said:

Stiff upper lip Phylter, Bill Jones... But thank heaven for Peter Sellers! .... President Merkin Muffley: [to Kissoff] "Good... Well, it's good that you're fine and... and I'm fine... I agree with you, it's great to be fine... a-ha-ha-ha-ha... Now then, Dmitri, you know how we've always talked about the possibility of something going wrong with the Bomb... The *Bomb*, Dmitri... The *hydrogen* bomb... Can you *imagine* how I feel about it, Dmitri?... Why do you think I'm calling you? Just to say hello?... *Of course* I like to speak to you!... *Of course* I like to say hello!... Not now, but anytime, Dmitri. I'm just calling up to tell you something terrible has happened... I'm sorry, too, Dmitri... I'm very sorry... *All right*, you're sorrier than I am, but I am as sorry as well... I am as sorry as you are, Dmitri! Don't say that you're more sorry than I am, because I'm capable of being just as sorry as you are... So we're both sorry, all right?... All right." (from Stanley Kubrick's, Dr. Strangelove) .... Meanwhile, Stanley 'no blood no foul' McChrystal's MINIMUM COLLATERAL DAMAGE PRODUCTION, anathema from the onset, grinds on.

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February 16, 2010
Votes: +4

don nash said:

	... Click, bang, and a shot through the heart of idiocy. Well said Chris.
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February 16, 2010
Votes: +3

Art James, bebop-o, GoodCelery! said:

	IDIOCY Upon returning to CONUS I think it means stateside Stanley, Graham, Pelosi, Reid, Michelle Obama, Barack Omama, GOD a notion to FOOLS? Read Blaise Pascal God Wager, essay! The honest world! THIS:` During the briefing, in unison` a Scream! YOU Genera Douche! YOU a `douche bags! Get in` the black bag!
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February 16, 2010
Votes: +0

Grandma Jefferson said:

Meanwhile the Troops on the Ground are Bitching... ..."MARJAH, Afghanistan - Some American and Afghan troops say they're fighting the latest offensive in Afghanistan with a handicap — strict rules that routinely force them to hold their fire." "If a man emerges from a Taliban hideout after shooting erupts, U.S. troops say they cannot fire at him if he is not seen carrying a weapon — or if they did not personally watch him drop one" "This is difficult," Lance Cpl. Michael Andrejczuk, 20, of Knoxville, Tenn., said Monday. "We are trained like when we see something, we obliterate it. But here, we have to see them and when we do, they don't have guns." http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/35409150/ns/world_news-south_and_central_asia/ Outrageous! They actually have to "see them" instead of just randomly spraying any area with a few hundred rounds? They can't operate under the time honored computer gaming protocols of HALO's Master Chief, obliterate anything that moves, filling the air with (insert your choice of color) mist just because those poxy antiquated, moth-eaten old Rules of War prohibit shooting unarmed persons, or areas where somebody might be hiding? What the fuck kind of "security operation" is this?? What a bummer! There might be "insurgents", "suiciders", who actually have the gall to sneak off and retrieve another weapon! And actually shoot back! Gawddammit, "we were trained"----by whom? Master Chief? Of course, the fact that they're illegal invaders who basically deserve anything they get as a result, seems to escape them. After all, this isn't HALO, and people really shoot back at you with live bullets, and there's no "restoring" a saved game. This "game" is for keeps. War, as Sherman once pointed out, is hell.

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February 17, 2010
Votes: +6